Dealing with grief and bereavement

Dealing with grief when losing a loved one is different for everyone. Bereavement happens to all of us at some point and we know we are going to be faced by the loss of someone close. Generally we expect it to be an elderly relative, but that is not always the case. However the loss occurs it can be a long and slow process coming to terms with the grief we feel.

There are several stages of grief which are briefly summarised below.

• Accepting the reality of the loss, feeling shock and numbness.
• The pain of grief with feelings of guilt, anger, distress and regret.
• Adjusting to a life where the deceased is missing and the reality of the situation.
• Move on with life whilst finding a way to keep the memories close.

When you feel able to it is important to talk to close family and friends. You will instinctively have a feeling about which friends will understand and listen. Don’t let negative statements telling you to ‘pull yourself together’ or ‘that you should be doing better by now’ impact on you. Everyone is different and will grieve in their own way. There is no right way to deal with the loss of someone close. Some people keep busy, some people want to talk. Remember, it is normal to feel the way you are feeling.

If you are concerned that you are struggling to cope then it is important you speak to your GP. Also, if you haven’t already then speak to someone close to you. If you don’t feel ready then don’t return to work too soon. You need to work through your feelings.

There several organisations that can help you deal with grief and bereavement.They can give you proper guidance and advice and listen to how you are feeling. Sometimes it is easier to speak to someone who did not know the person.

Here are some organisations who may be able to help you deal with your grief.

CRUSE Bereavement Care – Visit www.cruse.org.uk

CRUSE Bereavement Care offer advice to anyone who has been affected by a death, including bereaved military families.

The national telephone helpline 0844 477 9400 is open for calls from 9.30am to 5pm working days, and until 7pm on Mondays and Wednesdays. They will give you information about Cruse locally where you live.

The Compassionate Friends UK – Visit www.tcf.org.uk

TCF is a charitable organisation of bereaved parents, siblings and grandparents dedicated to the support of and care of other bereaved parents, siblings and grandparents who have suffered the death of a child / children.

TCF National Helpline 0845 123 2304 from 10.00am to 4.00pm and 7.00pm to 10.00pm.

Winston’s Wish – Visit www.winstonswish.org.uk

Winston’s Wish is the leading childhood bereavement charity in the UK. They offer practical support and guidance to bereaved children, their families and professionals.

Winston’s Wish national helpline 08452 030405

Child Bereavement UK – Visit www.childbereavementuk.org

Child Bereavement UK supports families and educates professionals when a baby or child of any age dies or is dying, or when a child is facing bereavement. Our vision is for all families to have the support they need to rebuild their lives.

Support & Information 0800 02 888 40

Grief Encounter – Visit www.griefencounter.org.uk

Grief Encounter’s vision is that every bereaved child in the UK, and their family, receives access to quality support to help alleviate the pain caused by the death of someone close.

020 8371 8455 – Monday to Friday between 9am and 5pm

The WAY Foundation – Visit www.widowedandyoung.org.uk

WAY is the only national charity in the UK for men and women aged 50 or under when their partner died. It’s a peer-to-peer support group run by a network of volunteers who have been bereaved at a young age themselves, so they understand exactly what other members are going through.

Tel: 0300 012 4929, email: info@wayfoundation.org.uk

Survivors of Bereavement by Suicide – Visit http://uk-sobs.org.uk

We exist to meet the needs and overcome the isolation experienced by people over 18 who have been bereaved by suicide. Many of our volunteers have themselves been bereaved by suicide.

SOBS National Helpline – 0844 561 6855 9am to 9pm every day.

NHS Choices – Visit www.nhs.uk/coping-with-bereavement

NHS Choices website offers useful information on bereavement.

Dealing with grief is a personal journey and there is no right or wrong way to grieve for a loved one. We hope this article has helped you and you have found it useful.  Thanks for visiting our website.