When your funeral director asks about readings, it can feel like one more decision to make at an already overwhelming time. The common fear is getting it wrong. You will not. A reading is simply a moment in the service when someone speaks — when words that mattered to the person who has died, or to your family, are shared with everyone in the room. Here is everything you need to know.
Do readings have to be religious?
No — not at all. This is one of the most widely held misconceptions about funerals. Readings at a funeral can be anything: a poem, a passage from a favourite novel, a piece of song lyrics, something the person wrote themselves. A faith-based service will traditionally include readings from scripture, but even then there is usually room for something personal alongside.
For a humanist, civil or non-religious service, readings are chosen entirely by the family. There are no restrictions, and your celebrant will help you find the right balance for the tone of the day.
How many readings?
Most services include two or three readings, though there is no rule. A longer service with several family members who want to speak can accommodate more. A shorter, more intimate gathering might have just one. Let what you want to say guide the number, not the other way around.
How long should a reading be?
Most funeral readings run between one and three minutes when read aloud at a steady pace. That is roughly 200 to 400 words for prose, or a poem of six to twelve lines. A reading that is too long risks losing the room; one that is too short can feel slight for the moment. If you are uncertain, read it aloud at home with a timer. What feels long at a kitchen table often feels exactly right in the room on the day.
Who gives the readings?
Anyone you choose. Family members often find it more manageable than they expected — and deeply meaningful — to stand and read at a funeral. It is a final act of love, and the congregation will be wholly on your side. If you are worried about getting through it, tell the celebrant or minister in advance that they can step in if needed. That quiet reassurance is usually enough to get people through. It is very rare for someone to be unable to finish.
If no-one in the family feels able to read, the celebrant or minister will do so on their behalf, with equal care.
How to prepare
Read the piece aloud several times before the day — not silently, but spoken. The words that trip you up at home are the words that will trip you up in the service. Mark any difficult names or phrases. Read slowly: in a church or crematorium, the acoustics often mean that the pace that feels natural to you sounds rushed to the people listening. Pause after each sentence. Look up occasionally.
On the day, take a breath before you begin. Take your time walking to the front. The room is not impatient.
Popular choices
Religious readings that appear most often include Psalm 23 (The Lord Is My Shepherd), Ecclesiastes 3:1–8 (To everything there is a season), and John 14:1–6 (In my Father’s house are many rooms). These are widely known, which means many in the congregation will recognise them and feel the weight of the familiar words.
Poems that families frequently choose include Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep by Mary Elizabeth Frye, She Is Gone by David Harkins, and Remember by Christina Rossetti. Our guide to poems for memorial cards has a fuller selection with the full text of each — many of them work equally well as a funeral reading.
Prose — a favourite passage from a novel the person loved, an excerpt from a letter they wrote, a paragraph from something they kept — can be among the most moving readings of all. The sound of words the person chose and valued, read aloud in their absence, carries something that a pre-selected poem cannot always match.
Song lyrics work well as a reading when the song has words worth reading rather than just hearing. Not every lyric survives the transition from music to spoken word, but many do. It is worth reading the words aloud without the melody to see whether they stand alone.
Printing the reading in the order of service
If you want the congregation to follow along — or to keep the words — print the reading in the order of service. This is particularly valuable for poetry, where the line breaks and the look of the words on the page are part of the experience, and for any reading in a language some guests may not speak fluently. If the reading is very long, a summary or the first and last stanzas may be enough.
You might also find our article on writing a eulogy helpful when planning the rest of the service.
If it would help, you’re welcome to download our free Readings Booklet (PDF) or our Prayers Booklet (PDF) for more examples to consider.
When you are ready to talk about the order of service, call us free on 0800 612 6484 or send us a message.
